Dear World, I’m Tired of Being Ashamed

Dear world, I’m really tired of being ashamed

The truth is I’ve lived with it for most of my life. Oh there are moments when it doesn’t hurt as much, but that doesn’t change the fact that shame is always there.

The crazy thing is I have no real reason to be ashamed

  1. I work hard
  2. I’m constantly looking for other ways to help others
  3. I respond to stress in a positive way [1]
  4. And I’ve committed my life to sharing the Gospel with people in another culture

So why am I so ashamed when I fall asleep at night? Simply because my life isn’t like everybody elses

see we have created a culture through media (tv, movies) and our friends that describes in detail what a person should be like.

  1. You should be married and have children
  2. Have a full time job
  3. A healthy social life
  4. And incredibly busy schedule that has absolutely no free time

Here’s the thing…my life isn’t like that

  1. I’m in my late thirties and single
  2. As a Missionary I don’t have a regular nine to five job since all of my time is focused on ministry (I do work incredibly hard, but not in a regular job)
  3. To be honest I’m kind of an introvert so the social life isn’t too strong
  4. And being on my own means actually having free time every once in a while

So without even thinking about it I become kind of ashamed and reclusive sometimes.

But not anymore

Because I realized our cultures emphasis on being just like eveyone else focuses my mind only on the things I CAN’T do. Instead of the awesome things that I CAN do.

  1. I am a personal tutor to children with special needs
  2. A comedic actor
  3. A entertainer [2]
  4. A Ghost Story teller
  5. An invaluable source of tech help [3]
  6. A marathon runner
  7. A silly uncle

Sadly there are many people out there like me who don’t fit into the idea of what people should be like, but we tend to hide our uniqueness [4]

Which makes me wonder…what would happen if all us decided to embrace our uniqueness instead of trying to hide it?

Look I understand there is a need for growth and development. But I’m done being embarrassed just because I am different than everyone else.

Because there is only one of me
And that’s alright as far as I’m concerned


  1. It does bring pain of course, but I choose to deal with the problem instead of running from it  ↩
  2. someone who loves being in front of large crowds  ↩
  3. you can just ask my parents  ↩
  4. shame can do that to a person  ↩

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